Happy Two Decades ^____^

Birthday Blues? Haha I don’t get it, today is my birthday and I’m supposed to be happy, well I am happy HOWEVER…something felt wrong, I can’t figure it out T^T

Maybe it’s because I’m sort of disappointed that for over the years my closest friends [I mean those who are like my sisters] kept forgetting about my b-day while in my shoes I never did forget their birthdays.   If I’m not too expectant perhaps I won’t be this gloomy > <

Leaving those bitterness behind, I want to say how grateful I am to my parents especially to my mom who gave birth to me sometimes in August, to my Dad’s participation or else all these [my existence] won’t be possible XD and of course to our Heavenly Father for giving the most precious gift someone could ever receive, life.  As the saying goes, “…what you did to your life is your gift to GOD.” Unfortunately at this point I still can’t present something that I’m proud of to God, my life’s not perfect despite having all the essential things [mostly material things] in life for I know something is still missing…for that I’m still incomplete and probably will keep wandering around until I figure out the reason for my existence.

I appreciate everything I have and I’ll be forever grateful that I’ve been gifted with a wonderful family I can always count on, my Mom who always got my back, my Dad though we often got into fights I still love so dearly [mind you, earlier he mentioned my name as he greets me a happy b-day…I don’t know but it tugs something in my heart as if my name sound so special and pleasant to the ear], my two adorb sisters who hides their cheesiness behind every “panget” and “tae” words they’ve said, also to Ate Flor who worries and takes care of my supplies hehe. 

As for the one who greeted me the earliest time possible (12:37 am with matching smiley pa), Kimeeh >///< he even got me a long message [actually he asked if I prefer long messages, pabebe pa ba ako? Of course I told him the truth].  Actually knowing he remembered my special day is enough to made me smile from ear to ear XD.

My cousin Gemma gave one of the longest message greeting I’ve ever received she never failed to touch my heart. Another person who made me feel special is Sis Grace, though we haven’t seen each other personally she still remembers my existence, my most thoughtful friend I’ll give her that credit.

There were also other greetings which come from my college friend Marvin, my superior Sir Rudy, my cousin Gellie, Kuya G, my best friend Roxanne, and HS friend Jessa.

To my MY PSBC FAMILY >///< this is my first b-day away from home but I never felt alone after all your warm greetings , I can’t ask for more. I can say this is one of the best b-day celebrations I ever had.  For the cake, thank you very much Jenna, Ate Lizette, Madame Winnie, Anne, Kuya Jay-Ar, Kuya Eric, Kuya Bernand, Em and Ms. Marge, words will never be enough to say how much I appreciate the surprise you guys prepared for me. I’ll treasure this very moment for the rest of my life. 

This is Faye, twenty and still counting~

[Entry: August 12, 2015]

Hey! It’s me again ^^, right now I’m currently listening to Darren Espanto’s “Stuck” and there’s this one particular line that got my attention ‘coz basically I felt that way. The said lyric goes like this “I’m silently hoping you’ll end up with me.” >///< Right after that song came Bruno Mars’ “Just the Way You Are”, which reminds me he don’t mind if I’m chubby and have stubby legs. Haha sometimes I wonder if he have poor eyesight or just because we’re friends that he won’t say any negative comments about me haha whatever it is…I appreciate that he never did mention or took notice of my imperfections.

Now getting to what this post is all about…

What are the indications that a certain someone is INLOVE?

*Dub! Dub! Dub!* Well base on my observation here are some instances that proves, YOU ARE INLOVE, ^0^)/

1. Without noticing, you started singing different love songs given that you usually don’t do that! Like out of the blue you sang, “Mahal Kita Pero”, “I’ll Be” or “You’re Still the One”…Heck! Those are just some of cheesy songs I’ve ever heard and definitely a sign of being inlove.
2. You start smiling more often well maybe just the thought of him and your times together flashback in your head. At this point others will think you’re losing your sanity, well who wouldn’t? For someone who smiles like an idiot while staring blankly to an open space, girl you do have some mental issues if it ain’t LOVE. 
3.   One day someone will notice something has changed that they can’t point out, is it something that you wear? Your make up perhaps? They way you walk? You just smile it off and *ting* they’ll figure out how blooming you appear in their very eyes while you sure as hell you haven’t done anything. I’m telling you it’s the vibes! You’re giving off some weird aura like your feelings is actually visible with hearts in shades of red and pink. Kind of gross but that’s how it works  XD

That would be all, till then~

[Entry: August 10, 2015]

Yesterday was a blast! I can’t help but think that each day I spent with Kim it’s always a day well-spent full of wonderful memories but I know it’s too soon to assume that after all we’ve only hang out twice…still it’s a great thing to look back whenever I’m feeling lonely :)

My very first anime event, otaku expo which I attended together with Kim and his easy to get along with classmate Niel was all it took to enjoy the event despite the fact that it was just the three of us.  Anime Quiz Bee, Merchandise, Jpop and Cosplay made wonders that day XD…

There’s this quiz bee entitled “HU U” wherein participants need to identify the name, title of the anime and the seiyuu of the anime character that will be flashed on the screen.  The game made me realized two things; one is how outdated and old school I am, geez I barely kept up with my two companions.  Honestly, I’m not very familiar with most of the characters…I felt pathetic! Another thing I realized is unknowingly I’ve abandoned and forgot what it takes to be an “Otaku” it’s like my old self being a diehard fan of anime was gone.  I find difficulty in remembering all the facts, everything about a certain anime… to make it short, I CAN’T RELATE!!! and Evil Kim never fails to tease me, it adds up to the shame I’m feeling if he only knew.  The heck > <

Every anime lovers would want any piece of tangible anime related stuff they could collect (e.g. shirts, posters, mugs, figurines, pins, keychains and a whole lot more) well who wouldn’t?  You’re happy just seeing this stuff in your closet, there’s a pride in it that through buying you were able to show how much you love that specific anime.  Collectibles…hmmm… not now > o < haha I don’t have budget for that just yet.  My heart was torn into pieces upon seeing RYOMA ECHIZEN figure, feeling helpless ‘coz all I can do was stare at it huhu.  Maybe someday, I’ll get my hands in it HAHAHA

Another thing that made me realized how much I changed is when I deserted JPOP and succumbs to KPOP.  I felt bad!  I used to memorized and sing out loud each anime songs I loved that I also erased western songs to make room for more Japanese songs… but now, KPOP take over my phone L.  Recently One Ok Rock is the only thing that connects me to Jpop, I deleted all anime songs before shocks! Probably one of the biggest mistakes I’ve ever done.  During battle of the bands, there’s this band who sang “Driving Myself” Prince of Tennis’ ending song I got so excited and even said “finally! Something I can enjoy.” Until the vocalist open his mouth and no lyrics comes out, =_=’ seriously? He did not memorize the lyrics?  Disappointed! HAHA well I can give the band an A for the effort of playing it, ghad hindi lang pala ako ang nagmamahal at fan na fan ng POT >///<.

What’s an anime event without cosplay?  One of the things I really look forward to whenever I heard of an event.  Seeing cuties dressed in maid costumes with makeup that emphasized their Japanese-like features, extravagant mecha costumes and of course pretty boys who made no effort with their costumes, their looks was enough to make girls squeal.  There were also those that look as if “napadaan lang” and Kim can’t help but voiced out his [rude/offensive] comments, what to expect with that guy? He can’t possible hide his obvious dislike for something HAHA, bad! XD But when he appreciate it, aba! Expect that he’ll turn his gaze for a moment longer than what is required, like with the girl who portrays a character from an online game monster something… >3< but he refuse to take a photo with the ones he like unlike me and Niel haha we approach shamelessly those cosplayers to have a shot with us.  For me it will serve as my very own souvenir from that memorable event.

Yesterday’s experience awaken my love for anime, I know I’ve wasted great amount of time on some trashy stuffs but anime was still there…waiting for me to return giving me a sense of comfort I only knew during my childhood days.  I will always love anime regardless of my age ^_____^

[Entry: August 7, 2015]

Day-um! Err, been sighting this word quite often > < and I know what a word to start this entry haha.  Anyway I just figured out why I’m having butterflies in my stomach each time I read Abbi Glines works it’s ridiculously because of her male protagonists’ POV that invaded my senses, knowing how hopeless romantic I am >///<

The thing is, they [Sea Breeze Boys] spoke like a lovesick teenagers, they were so explicit in expressing their thoughts, emotions, feelings that obviously will make every girl squeal from those heart fluttering words.  I myself was a victim of that HAHAHA! It’s so sweet that you’ll get hooked! What I’m scared about is what if I grew accustomed to that and helplessly look for that trait in every guy? 

[Entry: August 6, 2015]

Just for Now is making me upset. Ghad! This is the first time I actually appreciate a character whose life is so messed up, normally if one of the character’s past is unpleasant it gets in the way and I turned down that story.  It is something I can’t handle; I want purity and only perfection which is kinda off.  We all know nobody is perfect and characters in books is no exception and if it exist it will all be written based on someone’s fictitious mind. 

My heart hurts, it seems like I felt the pain of Preston’s character.  I wanna cry and sympathized for his misfortunes, what if someone like him does exist? Geez, I know very well I can’t handle that >___<

People having the same situation as Preston think they will never be good enough just because their life is tainted.  Goodness! Double tap in my sensitive heart T^T I end up having this weird emotional attachment with a character for the very first time! Not infatuation thou, but more likely because I deeply care about this one.  I can only wish someone will come and barge in their lives to save them from the pit of despair, just like what Amanda did in the story…BLOODY TOUCHING I must say.

“You can’t easily lie to someone you love after all you can never LOVE a LIE.”

“Hearts don’t realize they’ve been lied to.  They still love anyway.”

The last few chapters upset me even more! I’ve never been this frustrated over a book, I think?  How can I get over this? 

Till then~